September is a month of new beginnings. It is a transition month, we're switching gears from summer to fall... meaning the fun is over and its time to get busy. Change is inevitable. With change comes growth and wisdom. August was a month of closure (and not that fake ass relationship closure, that people who have a hard time letting go made up), where we're getting rid of all things that will distract us from reaching our full potential. In August we closed doors on those people and situations that were taken too much energy out of us. As we get back into grind mode, it is important we have a clear mind and spirit. We can not be bring old things into this new month, if we want to be successful.
Being fully transparent of my personal life...
I had been looking for a new job since January. I knew I wanted more than just working as a kindergarten teacher. I have goals, to become a university professor and author, but for the past two years I feel like I haven't made much progress towards those goals. Truth be told I got way too comfortable. I had got into a routine and this job paid me well and didn't require too much effort. I was bored. I was lazy and, honestly, I was miserable. My job was not challenging me. They weren't allowing me more responsibility, they didn't appreciate me and they gave a $0.50 raise, which solidified for me that I needed to upgrade my life. Not only was my work ethic slowly declining, I started to have issues with my coworkers. Now listen, I am not the friendliest person, I am not outgoing. I kept to myself and I was raised that in the work environment there is no such thing as friends, everything is business and never, ever, personal. I worked with an female staff, which was nothing really, because I graduated from an all women's college, but the drama was equivalent to middle school bullshit, you'd swear I stole all their boyfriends. The drama was hilarious to me at first, because no one really knew me to have a personal issue with me, I was always very helpful. I stopped giving a fuck when these bitches decided to act their shoes size and lie on me. (I never understood snitches in the workplace, it does nothing but create a hostile work environment, you're not getting a raise).
After 6 months of bullshit, anxiety attacks and having to walk out of my job to stop myself from acting my color, I finally found a job. From January to July I had been on endless interviews, applied for hundreds of job (I was applying to 20 a day) and was not having any luck landing a new job. I know the struggle of searching for a job, I lived through it most of 2018, luckily I was always employed. I prayed extra hard every night and some nights I stayed talking to God just venting. In the middle of July I was hired as a NINTH GRADE ENGLISH TEACHER and literally one week later I put in my 2 weeks (which was technically 4 weeks because I needed these MFers to know I was chucking up the deuces very, very soon). God was giving me patience, he was showing me that I was stronger than I believed myself to be.
There had been too many times in those 6 months I almost lost all my marbles. I was doubting myself and my capabilities. I was going home crying every night, because I thought there was something personally wrong with me to the point I couldn't get a new job. As I was having self doubts and my work environment had become unbearable, everything else in my life seemed to be going wrong as well. Not having a car was generating more problems, ending friendships that were suppose to last a lifetime was putting me in a dark place, and of course, relationships issue were brewing.
I wanted to give up, I wanted to just be a bummy bitch with no business. BUT, I never did. I never let any obstacle stop me from reaching my 2018 goal: finding a new job. And boom! I did it! After that, the blessings started pouring in. I got a new car, I saved up enough money to move out, I'm going to Jamaica for my birthday, and September 4th will be my first day teaching high schoolers. God really came through for ya girl and I am very grateful! September will be MY MONTH and I'm not just saying that because I am a September baby, but because I will make it so.
Always remember, "its not about how many no's you get, all you need is that one yes."